


I'm A Fighter

by AiLing



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-03
Updated: 2017-10-20
Packaged: 2019-01-08 12:43:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 18,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12254628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AiLing/pseuds/AiLing
Summary: When Amelia Shepherd discovers a shocking secret about herself, how would she react? How would those around her react to the devastating news? Based on Amelia's current storyline on the show.





	1. Chapter 1

I’m A Fighter

Hey guys- here is my new season 14 fic- based on Amelia’s new storyline on the show about the shocking discovery of her brain tumor and how she and those around her handle the news.

Dear @kazzieee had requested me to write about Addison/Charlotte flying over to Seattle to be with Amelia, so this is dedicated to her. <3

I also dedicate this fic to dear friends whom I regularly chat with, thank you for always keeping my lonely soul company! I love and really appreciate you all! <3

@elipcius, @fight-until-you-cant-fight-anymore @private-practice-fan

P.s This chapter is also loosely based on the promo for episode 3 of the actual show.

 

Chapter 1

Throughout her entire career, Amelia Shepherd had studied numerous brain scans of her patients. She had seen all sort of brain tumors, both benign and malignant. She had always been fascinated by tumors, seeing them on scans and removing them give her life. She loved the thrill and excitement of detecting a tumor in a patient’s brain and subsequently cutting the tumor out in the OR. The bonus? Patients were always grateful and thanked her for it.

But now, this was different. This was her own brain, not a patient’s. It felt really strange, studying her own brain. 

She stood still staring at the scans, feeling her entire world crumble around her yet again. Having lost so many loved ones in her life, she should have been accustomed to grief and pain. But each time she learnt bad news, she would feel like universe had dealt her another blow. 

‘Damn you, universe. ‘ she muttered to herself. The universe must really hate her indeed. She never could catch a break from bad things happening to her and her loved ones.

Meanwhile, the DeLuca siblings were still standing there, looking at her sympathetically.

The next thought that came to her mind was the irony of it all. She was a damn neurosugeon, and she had a brainless baby, her brother died due to a brain injury and now she had a brain tumor. How ironic was that? She could hear the lyrics to Alanis Morrisette’s song ‘ Ironic’ in her head. 

The irony of it all tickled her, causing her to laugh out loud. 

She continued laughing and laughing as the DeLuca siblings stared at her, with confused expression on their faces. They exchanged worried glances.

Andrew slowly walked over to Amelia, tapping her on the shoulders. Dr. Shepherd was one of his favorite attendings and he had the uttermost respect for her. Seeing her finding out about this broke his heart too. Her laughter scared him though and for a moment he thought the tumor might have caused her bizarre reaction.

‘Dr. Shepherd.’ he called, before pausing, at loss of words to say to her.

She turned to to look at him, wiping tears from her eyes. She didn’t know whether there were tears from laughing too hard or from the devastation she felt inside.  
‘ Isn’t it ironic?’ she asked him in a sarcastic tone. ‘ Isn’t it ironic for me, a brain surgeon, to be having a brain tumor? I see and operate on these type of tumors all the time! But now, who’s going to operate on me? Huh?’

She turned from a wordless Andrew back to her scans. It felt weird, studying her own scans.

From what she could see, the tumor looked benign, seemingly a meningioma. It was well circumscribed, with a regular border. It seemed to be about 10 cm x 10 cm in size, and located in her frontal lobe.

Her neurosurgeon mode took over as her mind raced with possibilities on how to treat this tumor of hers. Derek never stood the chance when he had brain injury after his accident, but she was given the chance now, so she was going to make full use of her neurosurgical expertise.

She straightened her back and lifted her head up, showing her superhero pose. She recalled teaching Edwards the pose, the same pose which she used whenever she was scrubbing in for surgery. She recalled using the pose before operating on Herman. She needed that superhero pose now, more than ever.

She was Amelia Superhero Shepherd and she wouldn’t go down without a fight. She was going to keep true to her personal motto- to fight until she couldn’t fight anymore, to never let go, never give up, never run, never surrender. She was going to fight the good fight.

She asked herself how she would treat this tumor if it were one of her patients. She would need surgery, that’s for sure. If for some reason not the entire tumor could be removed, she might need radiation therapy. And what were the complications that could occur from the surgery? Considering it was a large tumor- plenty of things could go wrong. She knew that the frontal lobe had a rich supply of blood vessels and nerves and with a tumor of that size, the blood vessels and nerves wouldn’t be spared. She knew that there would be risks of paralysis, loss of sensation and slurring or loss of speech, a few of the many things that could go wrong. She would need the best neurosurgeon available to operate on her. Who could she find to operate on her? Now that Derek was gone, who was the best neurosurgeon around? Nelson only operated on simple cases and not huge tumors like this. 

‘ Oh Derek- I need you right now.’ she thought to herself as she looked up at the ceiling. Maybe it was a sign that Derek wanted her to join him up there?

But then, what would happen to Owen? He would be devastated. In fact, she dreaded to think of what his reaction would be once he found out about her tumor.

‘ Can you help me print out those films please?’ she instructed Carina in a calm voice, although inside her heart was pounding. 

‘ Sure thing Shepherd.’ said Carina, feeling pity for the neurosurgeon whom she had just met.

_______________________________________________________________________________

15 minutes later, after convincing the DeLuca siblings that she was fine and wanted some time for herself, Amelia was sitted in an on call room with her scans and a pile of her own research notes. She figurerd that an on call room was the best place to be, with minimal disruptions and the least chance of bumping into someone she knew. She had read numerous articles before about meningiomas, and had done tons of research regarding it. But now that she herself had a meningioma, she wanted to find out the best possible and latest approach to treat it.  
All the articles she read and researched had mentioned surgery as the best way to treat the tumor. There were different surgical techniques though and she wanted to find out the latest and least invasive approach with the most minimal risk of complications.

She didn’t know how long she sat on the floor of the on call room, lost in her own world, going through the scans when the on call room door opened. 

In wandered a tired looking Richard Webber, who had just finished his shift and was looking forward to having some rest. 

He stopped on his tracks when he noticed that the on call room was occupied.

‘ Oh hello there Shepherd.’ he greeted Amelia as he spotted her sitting on the floor, holding the scans in her hand and being surrounded by what seemed like printed out research papers. ‘ Busy researching for an upcoming surgery?’

‘ Yes.’ she answered curtly as she turned her attention back to the scans.

Richard cleared his throat as he took a seat on one of the hard on call room beds. Amelia ignored him as she continued looking at the scans.

‘ You know, Shepherd, some people have been expressing concerns.’ Richard began. ‘Apparently, you have been performing surgeries without considering whether the risks of the surgery outweigh the benefits. I know that you’re a great neurosurgeon- the best we have in the country. But there are several factors that need to be taken into account before you operate on someone.’ he continued.

Amelia sighed, knowing that Bailey would have been the one telling Webber about her recklessly performing surgery on her young patient earlier on that day, after being informed by Jackson Avery.

She finally turned around to look at Webber. 

‘ My patient didn’t die, Webber. In fact, he fully recovered from his surgery and isn’t in pain now.’ she pointed out.

‘ I know, but what I’m trying to say is that- you wouldn’t be that lucky all the time.’ Webber tried to explain patiently. ‘ What if the next time you perform such a risky surgery the patient develops complications?’ 

‘ The next time? Would there be a next time?’ Amelia wondered silently to herself. 

‘ I appreciate that, Webber. I really do. But as you can see, I have a patient to tend to.’ Amelia said, trying to sound as polite as possible. The last thing she needed at the moment was Webber giving her a pep talk.

Ignoring Amelia’s reply, Webber was now focusing his attention on the brain scans that Amelia was holding in her hand.

‘ Wow, that is a huge tumor!’ he pointed out, ‘ I ‘m no neurosurgeon but that does not seem like an easy tumor to operate on. But I do have faith in you, that you can do it.’

That was the breaking point for Amelia. She couldn’t contain her secret anymore, she needed to tell someone. She trusted Webber more than anyone else to keep this secret of hers. He was like a father figure to her and to all the other hospital staff.

‘ Do it? You mean operate on my own brain?!’ Amelia asked, a hint of sarcasm in her voice. ‘ Because that would be groundbreaking surgery indeed.’

There was a tense silence in the room as Webber processed what Amelia was saying. Did the Head of Neurosurgery of their hospital and the top Neurosurgeon in the country just say that the scans she was studying was hers?

‘ Shepherd.’ he whispered, at loss of words to say to her. His heart really went out to her, she never seemed to be able to catch a break from bad things happening to her.

‘ Don’t Shepherd me.’ she muttered. ‘ And please don’t give me that look again, the look whenever someone has to deliver bad news. I hate that look.’

‘ I’ll help you find another top neurosurgeon in the country.’ Richard offered. ‘ I heard that Dr.Patterson from the Thomas Jefferson Hospital is ranked second after you.

‘ How are his credentials? The success rate of his surgeries?’ Amelia asked, now understanding the anxiety that patients feel about a surgery. 

‘ I heard that he has a 70% success rate, which is really high considering that neurosurgery is the field with the lowest success rates.’ Webber answered.

Amelia remained silent as she stared once again at the scans in her hands. She couldn’t picture another surgeon digging his hands into her brain. She couldn’t imagine having to leave her life up to someone’s hands. 

She shook her head silently as the weight of the situation finally dawned upon her. A stray tear rolled down her cheek.

Feeling his heart break for the neurosurgeon, Richard patted Amelia’s shoulder comfortingly.

‘ You need a support system.’ Richard pointed out. ‘ You can’t do this alone, no matter how strong and tough you are. Hunt needs to know. And you need to have family and friends to support you through this. You need to be surrounded by people who love you.’

‘ I have no one.’ Amelia shook her head sadly. ‘ No one cares about me. Owen has given up on me and thinks I don’t love him anymore. His family hates me. My own family hate me and think I’m a disgrace to the family. Meredith is busy with work and being a mother and I’m pretty sure she hates me too. Maggie has her own life to lead. My friends in LA are too far away and have their own families and lives. Derek is the only one who would have cared, but he’s no longer around.’

She looked up at Richard with sad and teary eyes. 

‘You should at least talk to Owen.’ Richard suggested. ‘ I’m sure he hasn’t given up on you, and would be there for you if you let him.’ 

‘ I’ve pushed him away time and time again.’ Amelia confessed. ‘ It’s not that I want to, I love him so much, but I can’t can control my actions and emotions sometimes. Now I now why.’

‘ I know Hunt. He would want to support you, if you tell him the whole truth. Please let him.’

Amelia nodded, admitting the truth in Webber’s words. Owen deserved to know, he was her husband after all.

‘ I’ll go and make some calls to find the best neurosurgeon for you, ok?’ Webber said reassuringly. ‘ I’ll ensure that you get the best treatment and service available.’

He got up to leave and ambled slowly towards the door, still reeling over his latest discovery. 

‘ Webber!’ he turned around to face Amelia again as she called out his name.

‘ Please don’t tell anyone.’ she begged him with pleading eyes. ‘ I want this to remain a secret between us. I don’t want the entire hospital to know. So far, only the DeLuca siblings know, and that’s because they were there when I saw my scans. But I don’t want anyone else to know about this.’

‘ I wouldn’t, I promise. You have my word on that. Patient confidentiality is very important in the medical profession.’ Webber said earnestly. 

‘ Ok.’ Amelia gave him a small smile, feeling somewhat comforted by the fact that at least Webber would have her back and be there to support her.  
_______________________________________________________________________________

The rest of the day went by in a daze for Amelia. She cancelled all her remaining surgeries and consults for the day- giving the excuse that she wasn’t feeling well, and left Nelson to do the pre and post operative rounds and to review incoming neurosurgical cases in the ER.

She locked herself up in the on call room for another few hours, engrossed in researching the latest surgical techniques for operating on a meningioma.

It would have been there in her brain for so many years to have grown to that size, she knew. She never felt any symptoms, no headache, vomitting, dizziness, no signs of increased intracranial pressure, which is why she never suspected any pathology in her brain and never had a brain MRI done. Another thought crossed her mind- the frontal lobe was responsible for controlling decision making, problem solving, spontaneity, judgement, impulse control, and social behavior. She wondered, could her decisions all this while- running away from James several years ago, and now Owen, have to do with the tumor? It couldn’t be her addiction though, because her addiction started during her teenage years. But how she ran away from those who loved her, could it be due to the tumor? She recalled having a patient who had reckless behavior, and made a 360 degree change in behavior after she removed his frontal lobe tumor. Could her case be similar? Maybe that was why she had no one, she kept on pushing people away and running away from those who loved her. In a way, it was a relief that she finally had an explanation for her behavior all this while. It wasn’t her fault that she couldn’t control her impulses to run.

Finally convinced that she had read up every single latest research about meningioma- Amelia walked out of the the on call room and brought her scans to one of the xray viewing rooms.

Placing them on the scan viewer, she stared at the scans of her brain again. Had it been a patient’s scans, she would have marvelled at what a beautiful tumor it was. But now that those were her own scans, it didn’t look beautiful at all. Instead, it looked like a monster.

‘ I’m going to fight you, monster of a tumor’ she thought to herself.‘ ‘I wouldn’t go down without a fight. I’ll fight you to the very end.’

Being so engrossed in the scans, she didn’t notice the door to the scan room opening. 

‘ So this is your hiding place huh? My family are convinced that you have disappeared from the face of planet earth.’ Owen said, as he walked over towards her. 

Amelia continued staring at the scans, her back facing him, as a stray tear rolled down her cheek.

She had to admit, his words hurt. If only he knew. If only they all knew.

‘ I have a patient.’ she answered, her voice quivering a little as she faced her back towards him, not wanting him to see the tears pooling in her eyes.

‘ Amelia.’ Owen sighed. He had enough of her strange behavior. It was obvious that she was hiding something from him, and he had enough of this. He was her husband, why can’t she just open up to him and tell him what the heck was going on with her?

‘ Amelia, look at me.’ Owen said softly but firmly. Amelia knew that when he used that tone of voice, it was best to obey.

She slowly turned around to look at him with watery eyes.

Owen’s heart sank as he saw the defeated expression on her face. He had seen that expression before, she wore the same expression when he told her of Derek’s death.

‘ I know…..I know that I’m the worst wife ever. I know that your mother and sister and Teddy hate me so much and think you deserve much better. They are right, you know. You can just leave me. It’s ok, really, I’ll understand.’ she rambled as tears started rolling down her cheeks.

Owen was really confused now. What on earth was she talking about? Of course her running away from him without explanation wasn’t the best decision she had made, but he never thought that about her. He still cared for her and loved her, why can’t she see that? The kiss with Teddy, which he was really regretting, made him realize that no matter how much he liked Teddy, his heart was always with Amelia.

‘ Amelia.’ he whispered as he cupped her face in his hands. ‘ Please tell me what is wrong.’

‘ You don’t deserve this, Owen.’ she said, shaking her head sadly.

‘ Deserve what?’ Owen was getting more confused by the minute.

‘ Deserve a wife with a huge tumor growing in her brain.’ Amelia blurted out, before releasing the breath she didn’t know she had been holding.

At that moment, Owen’s world shattered. He felt like a rug was behind pulled from under him.

‘No, this can’t be true.’ he shook his head in disbelief. Maybe she was playing a cruel joke on him.

‘ Look.’ she said in a shaky voice as she pointed towards the brain scans lined up on the viewer. ‘Those scans are mine.See that huge tumor in the frontal lobe there?’  
Owen stared for a long moment at the scans. He remembered Amelia showing him her patient’s scans during their happier times, whenever he requested to follow up on the patients he referred to her from the ER. He would have been fascinated by a tumor of that size as well. But not when it was hers.

‘ I need to find someone to operate on me. The best neurosurgeon ever. Webber is helping me to find. It probably has been growing there for quite some time, judging from the size. Based on the regular borders, it seems to be benign so the prognosis isn’t that bad, I hope. I have been doing some research regarding the best surgical approaches for this sort of tumor. I think cutting in straight from the frontal lobe is the best option’ Amelia rambled, her voice quivering. ‘ It’s going to be fine, the tumor can be removed, and éverything will be fine. But there might be complicatons- such as slurred speech, loss of sensory and motor function….’ 

‘ Amelia.’ Owen whispered as he pulled her in for a tight hug, feeling his heart break for her, and feeling guilty for blaming her for all her actions. He knew that the frontal lobe was in charge of the control of behavior and execution of function. Her behaving weirdly and running away from him might have something to do with the tumor. How could he ever forgive himself now for kissing Teddy? Would Amelia ever forgive him? 

Feeling the warmth of her husband’s hug and the comfort of his heartbeat, Amelia finally broke down. She sobbed and sobbed, letting go of all her emotions she kept bottled up inside. She continued sobbing, letting out her fear that she might have complications from the surgery, leading to paralysis, loss of speech and possibly death. She sobbed for Owen, whom she loved with all her heart but was unable to express her feelings for, due to the tumor controlling her actions. Her heart broke for Owen, as she wondered how would he go on with life without her. She shuddered thinking about it. Having suffered through the pain of losing loved ones so many times in her life, she had learnt that it was not the deceased who suffer, but rather the loved ones they leave behind. She couldn’t bear to do that to her husband.

Owen remained silent, embracing Amelia and rubbing soothing circles around her back, feeling her tears wetting his shirt.

His heart ached or her. He had seen how devastated she was by her father’s and brother’s death. And now this- when would she ever catch a break? Why did she have to go through so much crap in life? He didn’t know. All he knew was that he couldn’t bear to lose her, he didn’t know what he would do without her.

Amelia looked up at him with watery eyes, feeling safe in his embrace.

‘Owen, I’m scared. ‘she admitted. ‘I don’t want to die. I don’t want to leave you.’

‘No….you’re not going to leave me! You’re going to fight this, alright? ‘ Owen said earnestly as he squeezed her tight. 

‘Alright. ‘she replied in a muffled tone.

He released her from the hug and cupped her face in his hands as their eyes met. Hers were full of fear and anxiety. His were filled with guilt and devastation. He wiped away a stray tear from her cheek using his thumb.

‘Listen, you are the strongest person I know, Amelia. I love you so much. You’re going to survive and defeat this tumor like you defeat everything else in life. You’re going to get through this, stronger than ever. WE are going to pull through this stronger than ever. I’ll be by your side the whole time. ‘Owen said, full of convinction.

Feeling comforted by Owen’s words, Amelia wiped away her tears as she sniffled.

‘Ok, I’ll try to fight this for you. ‘she promised. ‘ Because I love you too.’

As she saw a smile forming on Owen’s face, she realized that it was the first time she had said it out loud.

She suddenly felt a new surge of energy and new found hope, knowing that she had Owen by her side.

‘We need to find you the best neurosurgeon possible. ‘ Owen said, repeating Webber’s words from earlier.

‘Webber promised me he would.’ Amelia said.

‘ I know, but I will search too. Maybe I can work together with him to find the best neurosurgeon in the world.’ said Owen earnestly. ‘I want the best for you, Amelia.’

Amelia nodded. ‘I just wish that Derek is here.’ she sighed. ‘I know he can’t operate on me because he is family, but at least he can pitch in the best possible approach.’

‘I know. ‘ Owen said sympathetically as he pulled her in for another hug.

A comfortable silence ensued as they both stood still in the scan viewing room, both engrossed in their own thoughts.

‘You need your LA friends by your side.’ Owen suggested, breaking the silence. ‘Do you want me to call them to come? You need their support too. I know how close they are to you and how much they mean to you.’

‘ I’ll call them myself.’ Amelia assured.

‘Are you sure? ‘Owen asked.

‘Yes, I haven’t talked to them in weeks. I miss them.’ she admitted.‘ Look Owen, I’ll be fine ok? ‘she gave him a dimpled smile.

Owen’s heart melted as he realized how much he missed her smile.

‘I’m going to speak to Webber and we’re going to make some calls to find you the best neurosurgeon in the world.’ said Owen. ‘I promise. ‘

‘Thank you so much Owen. ‘ Amelia said earnestly, feeling so grateful for him. ‘I’m going to tell Bailey and request the rest of the day off. I don’t think I’m up to working today.’

_______________________________________________________________________________

Bailey had reacted with shock when Amelia first told her about her tumor. She recovered quickly though and switched to her chief mode almost immediately, making sure that Amelia had less patient load and on calls for the next couple of months. Normally, Amelia would have protested, but this was a welcome change for her. She needed some time for herself, to take care of herself and reevaluate her life. She needed to take care of herself for a change.  
Half an hour later. Amelia was lying down on their bed at home, and staring at her phone. She house was quiet and empty, she had missed being in the house for the past few months.  
She had not called Addison or Charlotte for the past few weeks, she had been too busy to catch up with them. She also never answered their calls, as she was always occupied with something else whenever they called. Lying alone on the bed, she realized how much she missed her LA friends. They were the ones who really cared for her and were always there to support her. They stood by her throughout her entire drug addiction crisis, and she was sure they would stand by her through this as well. If only they weren’t so far away.

Owen was going to bring back some Chinese takeaway that night, after visiting Megan. She didn’t know if he was going to tell his family or not about her current condition. Maybe if they found out, they would understand her and forgive her actions. At least that was what she hoped.

Taking a deep breath,she dialed Addison’s number on FaceTime. Her heart was beating fast, she was nervous about this conversation. Usually, she looked forward to the FaceTime or phone conversations with her LA friends, but not today. She was dreading it, having to tell them bad news. But she really needed their support in times like these. A glance at the clock told her that it was 4:30 pm, which meant they were still at work. They were all probably gathered for a meeting in the kitchen, to discuss their cases for the day.

‘Amelia! ‘Addison answered with an excited voice after a couple of rings. ‘Finally! You never answered my calls the past few weeks. Is everything ok over there?’

Before Amelia could answer, the rest of the LA gang were now gathered around Addison.

She could see Charlotte, Violet and Jake, all waving happily at her. Sam and Cooper probably had patients, she figured.

‘I… ‘Amelia face scrunched as she saw the concerned faces of her old friends. ‘I……’ a tear rolled down her cheeks as she struggled to find the right words to say to them.

‘Has someone being treating you badly? Is it Hunt? Want me to kick his ass for you?’ Charlotte offered in her Southern drawl.

Amelia giggled despite herself. She knew she could count on Charlotte to cheer her up.

‘No…no….it’s just…. ‘she took a deep breath , wondering where to begin.

‘ Amelia, it’s ok. Just relax and take deep breaths. Use your words.’ Violet said in a calm voice.

‘Ok. ‘ Amelia exhaled. ‘Well- I just found out that I have a brain tumor.’

She could hear a spoon dropping on the floor as the entire kitchen fell silent.

She could see the looks of devastation on all their faces, especially Addison’s.

‘ Oh Amelia.’ Addison whispered at loss of words to say.

‘It’s a frontal lobe tumor, looks benign, a meningioma. But it’s 10 cm in size, meaning it might have been there for a long time, probably since my days in LA.’ Amelia rambled.

‘ Does Hunt know?’ Jake asked, a downcast expression on his face.

‘ Yes, he does. He’s being supportive. But he is busy with his family too, his sister Megan just returned back after being presumed dead for 10 years. ’ Amelia answered. ‘He and Webber are going to find the best neurosurgeon in the world for me.’

‘They’d better. Listen, Amelia, you’re going to kick this tumor in the ass alright?’ Charlotte said with full of conviction.

‘Gosh, I hope so, Charlotte.’ Amelia whispered.

‘I know so.’ Charlotte insisted.

‘Amelia- I’m going to book the first flight to Seattle tomorrow.’ Addison said in a serious tone. ‘You need someone other than Owen to be there to support you.’

‘But…what about Henry?’ Amelia asked, surprised.

‘Jake can take care of him.’ Addison suggested as Jake nodded in agreement.

‘Cooper and I can’t find a nanny for the triplets and Mason, but we send you all the love and good vibes.’ said Charlotte. ‘We’ll FaceTime ok?’

‘ Same with me and Lucas. But you can call me anytime we need to talk, if you need counselling.’ Violet offered.

‘Thank you so much you guys. You are the best friends ever.’ Amelia said, feeling so grateful for them.

As she hung up after chatting with them for another half an hour, she realized a couple of things:  
First- she wasn’t alone and she had many people rooting for her, second- she, Amelia Shepherd was a fighter and would fight this tumor to the very end and win the battle against it.

 

Alright guys- this is it, chapter 1 of my new fic.

I really hope you guys enjoy it! Comments, reviews, and messages are very much appreciated- do let me know what you think! I would love to hear from you all. <3


	2. I'm A Fighter- chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The events leading up to the surgery. Featuring Addison Montgomery

****I’m A Fighter - chapter 2** **

 

****Hey guys- here is chapter 2 of ‘I’m A Fighter’. Sorry for taking so long for this update, I keep on getting distracted by real life stuff.** **

****This chapter is based lightly on the promo for the next episode- about the events leading up to Amelia’s surgery. Making a guest appearance in this chapter is Addison Montgomery :)** **

****I hope you guys enjoy!!** **

****The same night** **

There was a tense silence in the kitchen as both Owen and Amelia tucked into their Chinese takeaway food. There were so many words unspoken and issues unresolved between them.

Owen cleared his throat, breaking the silence.

‘ So Webber and I have tried to contact several neurosurgeons today.’ he said.  ‘ We think that Dr. Patterson is the best and most qualified to operate on you.’

‘ It’s ok, Owen. I’ve  found someone who can operate on me.’ said Amelia as Owen looked at her questioningly.

‘ He is Dr. Tom Koracick, head of Neuro at John Hopkins Hospital and also my professor during medical school, residency and fellowship.' she added.

‘ Ok, that’s good.’ Owen said approvingly. ‘Yes, I’ve heard of him before. I heard he’s really good at what he does and I’m really impressed with his research on the latest neurosurgical techniques. I haven’t managed to contact him yet, but it’s good that you had. If you trust him enough and think that he’s the best to operate on you, then I’m not gonna argue with that.’

‘ He’s by far the best .’ Amelia confirmed.  'He was the one who taught me all those fine neurosurgical techniques during my residency and fellowship. He can be quite arrogant though because he knows that he’s the best. I WhatsApped him the image of my scans, and he claimed that he could operate on it with an eye closed. I trust him.’

Owen chuckled despite himself. Now he knew where Amelia got her arrogance from.

‘ Alright then.’ he agreed. ‘ If you trust him, so do I.’

‘ Look Amelia- I just want the best for you.’ he said earnestly as they held hands across the table. ‘ I don’t care who operates on you, as long as they are the best. I just want you to beat this.’ he said as he squeezed her hand.

Amelia smiled, glad that she had Owen’s support.

‘ I know.’ she said. ‘ I want to beat this beast too.’

Their eyes met as they looked at each other.

‘ We’re gonna beat this beast together.’ Owen said with conviction. ‘ You cannot do this alone.’

‘ I'm so glad that I have you by my side.’ Amelia said, as she smiled at Owen, showing her dimples, which melted his heart. He wished he could see those dimples forever.

‘ Yes, you do.’ he said earnestly.

‘ Owen, I FaceTimed my L.A. friends just now, and Addison is coming over tomorrow.’ Amelia informed. ‘ She wants to be here to support me.’

‘ Ok, that’s good.’ Owen said earnestly. ‘ I know how much your L.A. friends mean to you and you need their support too. I’m glad that you have them by your side.’

They exchanged a smile as they continued chatting and making plans for her surgery.

___________________________________________________________

A few hours later, they were both lying on their bed together for the first time in months. Owen had his arm wrapped tight around Amelia's shoulder, feeling like if he loosened his hold on her, she would leave him again. He couldn’t afford to lose her.

‘ How long have you known about this tumor?’ Owen asked, a downcast expression on his face.

‘ Only yesterday.’ Amelia admitted. ‘ I don’t know how long it had been growing in my brain though- probably for years since my days in L.A.’

‘ But you never experienced any symptoms all this while?’ Owen asked, puzzled.

‘ Symptoms of increased intracranial pressure? Nope. No headache, dizziness, vomiting, no loss or blurring of vision, nothing. Which is why I never suspected anything growing in my brain and never had an MRI done- I didn’t have any symptoms.’ Amelia answered. ‘ It was only when I voluntarily participated in Carina DeLuca’s research on the female orgasm that they coincidentally found the tumor in my brain.’

Owen would have chuckled at Amelia taking part in the study, had he been in a better mood. But at that moment- he was in a somber mood.

‘ Well, it’s lucky that you took part in the study then.’ he said.

‘ It has been growing for years. The frontal lobe is in charge of impulse control and actions. What if every single action of mine since my time in L.A. was a result of the tumor?’ Amelia wondered out loud. ‘ How about the impulsive and reckless behavior, running away from James, running away from you that day- all that was due to the tumor?’

She immediately regretted her words when Owen’s facial expression changed.

‘ Does that include you proposing to me and deciding to marry me?’ Owen asked in a hurt voice.

Amelia’s heart sank at his unexpected question.

‘ No, Owen, No.’ she cried. ‘ A tumor in the frontal lobe would only affect my actions and impulse control surrounding emotions, but will not affect my underlying emotions. My decision to run away when we have disagreements maybe, but my underlying feelings for you, those are real.’

‘ Ok'.Owen nodded slowly, as he tried to digest what Amelia was saying. He understood what she meant and he hoped that was the case too.

‘ So you’re saying that your decision to run away during our wedding and a few months ago was caused by your tumor?’ Owen asked, afraid of hearing the reply.

‘ Maybe.' Amelia replied. ' But I have to take responsibility for my actions too. I know it was an impulsive decision on my part, and I'm so sorry. '

Owen nodded silently at Amelia's reply, glad that she was now taking responsibility.

‘ But what about after your surgery? Would you still be the same person as you were before?’ he wondered out loud.

Amelia cupped his face in her hands as their eyes met.

‘ Owen.’ she said earnestly. ‘ I will still be the same person as before, and I will always love you.’

‘ I will always love you too.’ Owen whispered as he pulled her in for a tight hug. They held onto each other tight, not wanting to let go. This latest discovery made them realize that life was very short indeed and they should cherish all the time they had with each other.

___________________________________________________________

 

****The next day** **

Addison Montgomery had many things going through her mind as she looked out of the window of her cab heading to Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital. She had checked into her hotel and now she just couldn’t wait to meet her old friend Amelia Shepherd face to face.

Amelia had texted her earlier on in the morning, informing her that she had been admitted to a room on the neurosurgical floor and that an old professor of hers was performing surgery on her.

Learning that Amelia had a brain tumor was a shock to her indeed. She knew from medical school and surgical residency that the frontal lobe was in charge of emotions and impulse control, and wondered whether all of Amelia’s impulsive decisions that she made in L.A. including operating while high and running away from James were caused by her tumor.

She blamed herself for not noticing that Amelia was behaving differently while in L.A.  She knew Amelia from her pre-teen years. As a teenager, Amelia had always been impulsive and doing reckless things such as crashing her brother’s car and getting high on drugs. That was the main reason why Addison never noticed any change in Amelia’s behavior in L.A., especially after she relapsed. She had assumed that Amelia’s erratic behavior was due to her relapse and reckless ways. Never had it crossed her mind that it could be due to a tumor growing in her frontal lobe.

She felt sorry for Amelia. Poor girl could never catch a break. When she was 5, her father was shot dead in front of her. During her teenage years, she fell into addiction. In L.A., she lost her best friend Michelle, her fiance Ryan and her unicorn baby. When she went to Seattle, she lost Derek. Now, she has a damn tumor growing in her brain.

As the cab pulled up to the hospital, Addison was overcome by a feeling of nostalgia. The last time she stepped foot into this hospital was 7 years ago when Callie had an accident and Sofia was born prematurely.

She took a look at the building as she stepped out of the cab. Part of the building was under renovation, she heard that a fire had occurred in the hospital not too long ago. But the remaining parts of the building still looked the same.

She took a deep breath before she stepped foot into the building. The lobby had also been partially destroyed and was under renovation. Otherwise, everything else seemed the same to her as they were 7 years ago.

After asking a young receptionist at the counter where Amelia’s room was, she found herself walking towards the room, her heart pounding. She just didn’t know what to say to her old friend.  ‘ I’m sorry that you have a tumor growing in your brain.’ sounded inappropriate. She just wanted to hug her tight and tell her that everything was going to be alright.

‘ Come in.’ a male voice answered as she knocked on Amelia’s door.

She slowly opened the door and entered the room to see Amelia on the patient bed in a patient gown with Owen beside her. Standing in front of them was a man dressed smartly in a suit.

‘ Addie!’ Amelia called out excitedly as she spotted her old friend. ‘ You’re here!’

Addison rushed over to her side and both women embraced in a warm hug.

‘ Of course, I am. I'll always be by your side and will never let you go through this alone.’ Addison said as she held Amelia tight.

‘ Thank you for coming here.’ Amelia whispered as a stray tear rolled down her cheek.

‘ It’s my pleasure, I really miss seeing you in person.' said Addison.

‘ Addie- this is the person who will be performing surgery on me, my professor Dr. Koracick. He’s the head of Neurosurgery in John Hopkins and he taught me all the surgical skills during my residency and fellowship.’ Amelia introduced.

‘ And one of the best Neurosurgeons in the country.’ Dr. Koracick added as he extended his hand for Addison to shake.

‘ Dr. Koracick, this is my good friend, Addison Montgomery, one of the best Ob/Gyns we have in the country.’ said Amelia as Addison blushed.

‘ Hello Dr. Koracick, I’ve heard a lot about you.’ Addison admitted, feeling starstruck as she shook his hand politely. ‘ It’s nice to meet you in person.’

‘ Everyone knows about me.’ Koracick smirked. ‘ Alright, I’ll leave you three alone as I review Amelia’s blood results and repeat scans for tomorrow’s surgery.

As he left, a tense silence filled the room as Addison and Owen looked at each other.

‘Thank you for coming, Addison.’ Owen said as he nodded politely at Addison. ‘ Amelia always told me about you and how you are always there to support her.’

‘ It’s my pleasure. She’s my good friend, I need to be here for her.’ Addison said as she took a seat on the other side of Amelia’s bed. ‘ Right Amelia?’

‘ I need both of you by my side.’ Amelia admitted as she looked at her husband and her good friend.

' Well, you have us both.' Owen said as Addison nodded in agreement.

‘ I’ve got to go check on Megan now, I’ll catch up with you later.’ Owen informed Amelia as he gave her a quick affectionate kiss on the lips.

‘ How are you feeling?’ Addison asked Amelia with concern as soon as Owen walked out of the room. ‘ I mean, I know that finding out about this isn’t exactly a great feeling, but how are you handling everything?’

‘ I will be fine.’ Amelia answered confidently. ‘ It’s an easily operable benign tumor, and I have one of the best neurosurgeons in the country operating on me. I have Owen and you by my side. I’ll be fine, Addison.’

Addison smiled as she climbed on the bed beside Amelia and held her tight. Relishing in her friend’s embrace, Amelia leaned onto her, and they sat in silence in that posture for several long moments.

‘ You said you possibly had it for a long time?’ Addison asked.

‘ Yes. Dr. Koracick said it has been growing for about 10 years, which is since my time in L.A.’ Amelia answered. ‘ He said that I have not been a sound mind since then. I’m thinking that it might have affected my impulse and decisions. He did hint to me that it might have affected by surgical skills and judgment.’

‘ Oh Amelia.’ Addison whispered, at loss of words to say to her friend.

‘ I am now wondering whether it might have affected my surgical performance in L.A.’ Amelia admitted.

 ‘ You had lost only one patient in L.A., which is Dell. And there was the veteran woman whose eyesight you couldn't save. Other than that, all your other patients survived without complications.’ Addison assured.

‘ Do you think that I could have saved Dell had I not had a tumor growing in my brain?’ Amelia wondered out loud. ‘ Do you think that my tumor could have caused me to make a fatal mistake which caused him his life and Betsy her father?’

There was a brief moment of silence as Amelia’s question shocked Addison. She knew that Amelia was one of the best neurosurgeons in the country with excellent surgical skills. Surely Amelia herself would know that Dell’s death wasn’t her fault and that she had fought tooth and nail to save him?

‘ Amelia- you know yourself that you did everything you could to save Dell. It wasn’t your fault that you couldn’t save him, he just collapsed so suddenly without warning after everyone thought that he was fine.’ Addison said comfortingly as she put an arm around her friend's shoulder.

‘I don’t know- maybe all my actions have been controlled by my tumor. I can’t stop recalling now all the patients I've operated on so far and whether I could have saved more patients had my tumor been detected earlier. I also can’t help but wonder whether all the stupid decisions I’ve made so far are due to the tumor. Maybe they are, maybe they’re not. But I cannot blame my poor judgment skills solely on the tumor. I have to take responsibility for my actions too.’ Amelia admitted.

‘ Amelia- stop blaming yourself, and concentrate on having the surgery now ok? You’re gonna have this darn tumor removed and you’re gonna recover and then take it from there. Right now, just focus your mind on the surgery.’ said Addison as she squeezed Amelia’s hand in support.

' I’m just wondering about what happens after the surgery. Will I be the same person as before? I know that the frontal lobe only controls decisions and actions and not underlying emotions. But I can’t help but wonder whether I would be a different person. Will I still feel the same towards Owen? How would this impact my relationship with him? I’m scared, Addison.’ she said as her face scrunched.

‘ I know you’re scared.’ Addison said. ‘ But I also know you, Amelia. You’re a fighter. You have gone through so much in your life and yet you’re still standing strong. You’ll get through this.

‘ Addie, you’re such a good friend.’ Amelia said earnestly as tears started rolling down her face.

‘ That’s what friends are for.’ Addison said as she pulled Amelia in for a tight hug.

In the comfort of her friend’s embrace, Amelia broke down, releasing all her fear, confusion, anger and guilt. She never realized how much she missed Addison until Addison was there in person by her side.

Addison continued holding Amelia tight, feeling sorry for her friend. She knew that Amelia had been through so much in her life, and she wished she could do more for her. But right now, Amelia needed her support more than anything, and she was going to give Amelia her full support.

They lied down on Amelia’s bed in silence, both engrossed in their own thoughts, with Addison still holding Amelia’s hand. Amelia had to admit, having Addison by her side was so comforting indeed, it gave her the strength and courage she needed to face the surgery.

___________________________________________________________

 

An hour later, Addison was still lying on the bed with Amelia. They were both chatting animatedly, catching up with all that was going on in their lives for the past few weeks.

Amelia was confiding in Addison about her rocky relationship with Owen, with her running away from Owen due to her fear of having another anencephalic baby, leading to them drifting apart, but Owen stepping up to support her when he found out about the tumor.

Addison updated Amelia on the latest news in Oceanside Wellness, about what their friends were up to, and the latest interesting cases.

 Amelia smiled as Addison swiped through her phone, showing her the latest photos of Henry.

‘ He’s so adorable.’ Amelia said in awe.

‘ He’s best friends with Lucas. Those two are inseparable, I tell you.’ Addison laughed. ‘ Violet and I always arrange for them to have playdates together.’

‘ It's so cool that they’re friends with each other.’ Amelia said earnestly. ‘ How are Mason and the triplets?’

‘ Mason is fine- he scored straight As for all his subjects this semester, and is the top of his class. The triplets are getting more and more adorable each day. I swear I can never tell them apart.’ Addison chuckled.

Just then, the room door opened.

Amelia gasped in surprise as she saw Maggie, Meredith, Alex, April, Bailey, Nathan, Webber and Andrew enter her room.

She had told Maggie about her brain tumor earlier on that morning before Dr. Koracick arrived to assess her. As expected, Maggie burst into tears and hugged her tight, saying that she was allowed to cry because she had lost her mom and didn’t want to lose her too.

She asked Maggie to help her tell Meredith about the news. What she didn’t expect was for Maggie to tell their other colleagues about it as well. She knew that Bailey, Webber and Andrew had known about her tumor earlier on, but she didn’t expect to see Alex, April and Nathan there too.

‘ Oh hello, Montgomery. It’s nice to see you here. You still look the same.’ Bailey greeted as Addison got up from the bed and gave her a hug which she reciprocated awkwardly.

‘ It’s nice to see you all here.’ Addison replied as she shook hands with them.

‘ We’re all here to see Amelia.’ Webber admitted. ‘ We heard that she is undergoing surgery tomorrow, so we want to wish her good luck and send good vibes.’ he added.

‘ Thank you all so much for coming to support me.’ Amelia said earnestly, pleasantly surprised by all the visitors. All this while, other than Owen, Meredith and Maggie, she seldom interacted with the other attendings and residents, always preferring to be alone instead of hanging out with them outside of work. That was why she didn’t expect so many people to be there to support her. It made her heart swell and tears pool in her eyes.

‘Amelia, I just heard.’ Meredith said as she made her way to Amelia’s bedside.  ‘ I’m so sorry.’

' Sorry for what?' Amelia muttered although she knew the answer.

‘ I’m sorry for the times I’ve been so harsh towards you.’ Meredith admitted. ‘ I guess you remind me too much of Derek. I’m so sorry, I don’t want to lose you.’ she said as she squeezed Amelia’s hand.

Amelia shrugged and gave Meredith a teary smile, debating on whether to say out loud that it took a tumor for Meredith to apologize to her for the way she had been treating her. She decided that it was not worth it and to brush it off instead.

‘ It’s ok Meredith.’ said Amelia earnestly. ‘ I forgive you. Life is too short to hold grudges. You're my sister after all.’

The two sisters exchanged a smile, glad that any previous misunderstandings between them had been forgiven.

‘ I’m sorry, but April, Alex and Nathan overheard.’ Maggie admitted as she walked over to the other side of Amelia’s bed. ‘ They wanted to come up to see you too.’

‘ Yes, I’m so sorry Amelia.’ April said as she sat on the foot of Amelia’s bed. ‘ I’m praying for you to pull through. I’m going to the hospital chapel after this to pray for you if you don’t mind.’

‘ Thanks, April.’ Amelia answered gratefully. ‘ I’m not the religious type, but I do appreciate prayers.’

‘ I’m wishing you all the best, Shepherd.’ Alex said as he smirked at Amelia. ‘ You’re going to get through this, I know. You’re a fighter.’

Amelia smiled, remembering how she had confided in him about her unicorn baby once in the attending lounge.

‘ I’m just so glad to see you all here.’ she said earnestly to them.

 ‘ Really. Thank you all so much for being here for me and supporting me. I really appreciate it.’

‘ We're family. We're all here for you.’ said Maggie, as she hugged Amelia.

Amelia exchanged a quick glance with Addison who was smiling too, glad to see her friend having the support of so many people.

Just then, Dr. Koracick entered the room holding Amelia’s repeat brain MRI and blood results.

‘ Alright, Shepherd, I have all your pre-operative investigations ready. You’re fit to go. Are you prepared? Your surgery would be scheduled for 8 am tomorrow, you’ll be fasted from 8 pm tonight.’

‘ Right I am.’ Amelia said confidently, even though her heart was pounding inside. She trusted her professor and knew that she was in the best hands. However, she couldn’t help but feel anxious. As a surgeon, she knew that even the most routine of surgeries would have risks of complications and even death. What if she became paralyzed, blind or lost her speech?

Taking a deep breath and shaking all the negative thoughts out of her mind, she added. ‘ Let’s get this show on the road.'

‘ That's the spirit! I always make sure to impart to my students this fighting spirit.’ Dr. Koracick exclaimed as he gave Amelia a high five.

‘ I’ll go book the OR for tomorrow.' Bailey announced.

‘ I’ll inform scrub nurse Bohkee to prepare the OR.’  said Webber. He knew that Bohkee was Amelia’s favorite scrub nurse and Amelia would love to have her assisting in her surgery.

‘ Thank you, Webber. I do want her scrubbing in on my surgery. I also want DeLuca to be the resident scrubbing in.’ Amelia informed as she looked at Andrew and winked at him.

‘ Thank you so much, Dr. Shepherd.’ Andrew said gratefully, his heart leaping for joy at the opportunity of scrubbing in for such a major surgery. At the same time, he was hoping that Amelia would pull through the surgery. The neurosurgeon was now fast becoming his favorite attending.

As Bailey, Webber and Andrew left to prepare for Amelia’s surgery, the rest of the people in the room stayed back to have a light-hearted chat with Amelia, which eased her anxiety.

_________________________________________________________

 

That night, Owen and Amelia were both left alone in the room. Their colleagues had either gone back home or were on call, and Addison had gone back to her hotel room.

Owen was sitting beside Amelia on the hospital bed. There was a comfortable silence between them as they both stared at the  TV, not really paying attention to what was playing on the screen.

Amelia cuddled closer to Owen as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She leaned forward to his chest, feeling the comfort of listening to his heartbeat.

She had already started fasting, and an IV drip was being inserted into her. The moment the nurse inserted the IV drip into her, the reality of the situation hit her hard. She was the patient now, she was going into surgery to have a huge tumor removed from her brain. Now she understood the anxiety that patients faced before going to surgery. No matter how she tried to convince them that it was just a routine surgery which had been done so many times before, she still couldn’t relieve their anxiety totally. She couldn’t guarantee them that the surgery would go on smoothly. There was always the risk of complications. There was never a guaranteed outcome in surgery. Knowing all this as a surgeon made her anxious. She knew exactly what Dr. Koracick would be doing the next day, which part of her brain he would drill into, and the nerves and blood vessels which would be in the way. That made her even more anxious, knowing which nerves and blood vessels of hers might be affected.

Sensing Amelia tense up in his arms, Owen released his hold on her and cupped her face in his hands.

‘ I know you’re anxious. I can sense your anxiety.’ he said. ‘ It’s going to be fine, Amelia. You’re going to pull through this, ok? You said that Dr. Koracick is the best neurosurgeon in the country and I trust your judgment.’

‘ I know he’s the best. I was fine until the blood investigation results, pre-operative scans and IV drip make it all real. What if I get permanently paralyzed or blind, or worse still never wake up?’ Amelia asked as she looked at Owen, fear showing in her eyes. She had put on a brave front for others, but with Owen, she could feel her defenses crumbling and her insecurities surfacing. She felt comfortable exposing her innermost fears to him.

‘ Amelia, don’t say that.’ Owen whispered, feeling his heart sink at her words. A stray tear rolled down his cheek as he looked at her with pleading eyes. He could never bring himself to imagine life without Amelia. No, he could not afford to lose her. ‘ You’re not going to die or go blind or paralyzed. You’re going to pull through this like you pull through everything else. Fight for me, ok?’ he added with conviction as he pulled her in for a tight hug.

‘ Ok.’ Amelia nodded as she felt tears rolling down her cheeks.

‘ I’ll fight for you. I’ll fight for us. We’re going to be ok, right?’ she asked, looking up at him with teary eyes.

‘ Yes, we’re going to be ok. We’re going to pull through this together.’ Owen said confidently. ‘ I’ll be up there in the gallery watching.'

Amelia gave him a teary smile, showing her dimples.

They held hands as they looked at each other in the eye, full of love.

‘ I love you so much Amelia, and never want to let you go.’ Owen said earnestly as he used his thumb to rub a stray tear from her cheek.

‘ I love you too and I don’t want to leave you.’ Amelia sniffled as she looked up at him with a sad expression.

Still cupping Amelia’s face, Owen bent down to kiss her gently but passionately on the lips.

She reciprocated the kiss, which became heated fast as his hands cupped the outline of her breasts and hers traced the outline of his broad chest.

Owen pulled away before they could take their kiss to the next level, which made Amelia groan in disappointment.

‘ You have an IV drip connected to you, and you're having surgery tomorrow.’ he pointed out. ‘It’s just not right.’

‘ Well, in case I never wake up from the surgery, I would want my last night on earth to be filled with orgasm.’ Amelia half-joked.

‘ Sorry, no filter.’ she muttered when she saw Owen's terrified look upon hearing her words. ‘ Maybe when I have this thing removed from my head, I will develop a filter.’

Owen shook his head as he pulled her close to him for a cuddle. They remained in that position, cuddling close to each other for the entire night.

___________________________________________________________

 

****The next morning** **

 

 When Amelia’s personal nurse Emily entered the room, the couple was still lying on the bed, cuddled close to each other.

‘Good morning, Dr. Shepherd.’ she greeted cheerfully. ‘ It’s surgery day. Rise and shine.’

Amelia groaned and rubbed her eyes. As she saw the IV line attached to her, she instantly remembered that she was the patient, and not the surgeon performing the surgery.

‘ As you would know, you need to shave your head.’ Emily ordered gently as she passed her a pair of scissors.

Amelia stared at the scissors for a long time. She loved her hair and to have even a part of it cut off made her sad.

‘ I can help her do it.’ Addison offered as she entered the room and walked over briskly to Amelia, enveloping her in a hug.

‘ Addie.’ Amelia whispered, looking at Addison with teary eyes.

‘ It’s ok, Amelia, it’s gonna grow back.’ Addison said softly as she smoothed her friend’s hair.

A few minutes later, they were in the bathroom, as Addison gently shaved the hair off the part of Amelia’s head which was to be operated on.

Amelia’s face scrunched as she watched strands of her beautiful hair fall onto the floor. She stared at the mirror and saw a bald patch left on that portion of her head.

‘It’s ok, I know it hurts.’ said Addison soothingly as she straightened the remaining of Amelia’s hair to let it cover the bald area as much as possible. ‘ You can cry as much as you want, Amelia. Let it all out. It’s ok.’

At Addison’s words, Amelia allowed the floodgate of tears to open.  Addison hugged her tight as she sobbed and sobbed, releasing all her anxiety regarding the surgery.

___________________________________________________________

 

An hour later, Amelia was lying on the patient trolley as she was being wheeled to OR3. Several nurses were pushing her trolley, and Owen was walking on one side of the trolley with Addison walking on the other side.

Amelia’s heart was pounding rapidly. Now she knew how her patients felt the moment they were being wheeled into surgery.

Everything was a blur to her that morning. Dr. Koracick had entered her room again to explain the procedure and the risks of the surgery to her as a formality even though they both knew that she was very familiar with the surgery. Her mind was blank and her heart numb as she signed the consent form for the surgery.

Before she knew it, it was time for her surgery.

As her trolley stopped outside the closed OR door, Amelia turned to look at Owen and Addison, the two most important people in her life at the moment.

‘ Addie.’ she whispered, grabbing hold of her friend’s hand. ‘ If I don’t wake up….please tell the rest of our friends in LA that I love them so much and am so grateful for their friendship and support all this while. And send my kisses and hugs to Henry. Tell everyone there not to miss me too much…. and think of it as a reunion with my dad, my baby, Ryan and Derek.'

‘ No, Amelia.’ Addison said, shaking her head. ‘ You’re going to have to tell them yourself when you wake up.’

Amelia smiled in reply as she turned to the right to look at Owen and grab hold of his hand.

‘ Owen. I’m sorry for everything that I’ve done, for running away from you like that. You deserve better. Just know that I love you so much. If I don’t wake up, please promise me you’ll go on with life and find someone who would give you all the love and the family you’ve always wanted. And please tell Maggie, Meredith and the rest that I love them too.’ she said as a stray tear rolled down her cheek.

Owen shook his head sadly as a stray tear rolled down his cheek too.

‘ You’re going to have to tell them yourself.’ he said. ‘ And yes, I’m going to have the family I’ve always wanted, with you.’

He bent down to cup her face in his hands, as their eyes met and they stared at each other, full of love.

They shared a passionate kiss for a long moment before the OR doors opened and Amelia had to be wheeled into the OR.

‘ I love you both so much.’ Amelia said as she bid them a wave goodbye and the OR doors closed behind her.

In the OR, Amelia was pleased to see Bohkee already scrubbed in and preparing the surgical instruments. Bohkee was the scrub nurse she trusted the most.

As she looked into the scrub room, she could see Dr. Koracick and Andrew scrubbing in for the surgery.

When she stared up at the OR, a smile formed on her face as she saw all her colleagues at the gallery staring down at her, there to cheer her on. Maggie, Meredith, Nathan, Bailey, Webber, Alex, April, Arizona were all there, smiling at her. She waved at them, feeling grateful for their support.

' I love you guys.' she said.

They waved back at her as Maggie gave her a french kiss. She saw Addison and Owen joining them in the viewing gallery, which was full. She exchanged a smile with both of them, as Addison gave her a thumbs up sign.

Feeling energized by all the support she was getting, Amelia took a deep breath in and stood in her superhero pose, the pose she had always used before scrubbing into surgery. Just standing in that pose gave her hope and confidence that she was going to pull through.

To her pleasant surprise, everyone else in the OR and viewing gallery followed her pose. It made her feel so grateful to see all these people supporting her. Realizing that she wasn’t alone and had so many people by her side, she climbed onto the operating table and lied down with a smile on her face.

‘ Alright, it’s a beautiful day to save lives.’ she announced, using her brother’s famous quote which he mentioned each time before a surgery.

‘ It’s a beautiful day to save lives indeed.’ she heard Bohkee, who had scrubbed in with Derek for numerous surgeries, repeat.

Not long after, darkness engulfed her.

 

****Here it is- Chapter 2 of ‘I’m A Fighter.’ I really hope you liked it, please do let me know what you think guys! Comments, reviews, messages and reblogs are very much appreciated, I would love to know what you think! <3** **

 


	3. I'm A Fighter - part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amelia recovers at home post surgery

I’m A Fighter- part 3

Hey guys- here is chapter 3 of ‘I’m A Fighter’. This chapter describes Amelia’s recovery at home, post operatively- and depicts her interactions with Owen, Addison and Megan. Enjoy!!! :)

P.s. I apologize in advance for this chapter being even more lengthy than usual. :P Guess I got a little carried away 

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It was raining heavily as Amelia stared out of the car window, not noticing Owen looking at her.

She was finally going home after several months, and it was a weird feeling indeed.

Now that the tumor had been removed from her, she felt like an entirely different person altogether. Like what DeLuca had pointed out- she was so used to being sick and having a tumor growing inside her head that when it was finally removed, she felt like something was missing. The tumor had been a part of her for so long that she didn't know who she was anymore now that it was gone.

The recovery from the surgery had been painful. She was in a coma and intubated for 11 hours, spoke only French for the first day, and was in extreme pain for the first couple of days. Most of all, she was confused and scared. She didn’t know what lied ahead of her. Would she still be the same person? The same wacky, sarcastic Amelia who loved to make witty remarks? Would she still be able to remain a surgeon? Could she still operate on patients with the same surgical precision as before?

The most pressing question in her mind was-would her relationship with Owen still be the same? If her proposal to him and getting married to him, but also running away from him was due to the tumor- then what would happen now between them, with the tumor being removed from the equation?

As they reached a traffic light, she turned away from the window to look at Owen, who was gazing at her lovingly. He seemed to be so glad that she was finally following him home. 

She had offered him an out- saying that she didn’t know who she was anymore and that he was free to leave her. She had even planned to stay with Meredith and Maggie as she was recovering, not wanting to place a burden on him. To her pleasant surprise, he walked towards her instead and took her hands in his, claiming that he married her and not the tumor, adding that they were together in sickness and in health. To top it off, he asked her to come home with him.

Of course, she noticed that he wasn’t there by her side during the first couple of days post-operatively when she was in pain. Meredith, Maggie, Addison and even DeLuca took turns to visit her, but not Owen. She didn’t blame him though, she knew that he was still confused, angry and upset about all her actions during the past year and was also still reeling from the shock of discovering that she had a brain tumor. Furthermore, his sister Megan also needed him by her side. He would also have been out grocery shopping, buying her favorite food and adjusting the thermostat at home to prepare for her homecoming.  
Sometimes, she really wondered what did she do to deserve such a wonderful man in her life.

As their eyes met and they looked at each other lovingly, Amelia rested her hand on Owen’s lap and he placed his hand on top of hers. With the tumor gone, nothing was going to get in between them now.

15 minutes later, the car pulled up in front of the house, which seemed dark and abandoned. With Amelia not staying there for the past few months, and Owen spending most of his time at the hospital, the house seemed to be unoccupied and this gave it an eerie feeling.

As they entered the house and Owen switched on the lights, Amelia looked around, inspecting the house which she had not stepped foot in for the past few months.

The entire living room looked the same as she remembered, except that it had been tidied. The couch, the TV, everything was still in the exact position as she recalled. On the coffee table were several bouquets of flowers, all labeled ‘Happy Homecoming, Amelia.’

Tears now welling up in her eyes, Amelia walked over to the kitchen and opened the fridge, which was stocked with all her favorite food, including yogurt and frozen pizza.

‘Owen- thank you so much for doing this for me.’ Amelia said gratefully as she walked over to him and embraced him in a hug. 

‘You’re my wife, Amelia, and I’m just so glad that you’re home.’ Owen replied as he kissed her tenderly on the top of the forehead.

He then cupped her face in his hands as they looked at each other in the eyes, full of love.

He now reached down to kiss her on the lips as she tiptoed to reciprocate, and they kissed passionately.

‘Welcome home, Amelia.’ Owen whispered into her ear, hugging her tightly.

‘I’m so glad to be home.’ Amelia muttered, still in his embrace. 

She realized that it felt so good to be back home where she belonged.

_______________________________________________________________

Later that night, the couple were both snuggled up in bed, cuddling each other, just savoring the moment of being in each other’s embrace.

Owen didn’t realize how much he missed having Amelia in his arms. Amelia didn’t realize how much she missed Owen’s strong arms wrapped around her, making her feel safe and secure.

Amelia suddenly released herself from Owen’s arms and darted to the bathroom to throw up. She was still experiencing some nausea and vomiting post surgery.

Without hesitation, Owen rushed over to her and rubbed circles on her back as he held her hair up. It broke his heart to see her so ill and he wished he could do something to make her feel better.

When she had nothing left to throw up- she sank on the floor groaning.

‘I hate this. ‘she muttered. ‘Koracick did warn me about having occasional bouts of nausea for the first-week post op.’

‘I’m sorry, is there anything else I can do to help? ‘Owen asked, feeling helpless and wishing that there was more he could do to help her.

‘Its ok, I’m just grateful to you for being here with me.’ Amelia replied weakly.

Owen carried her to the bedroom and lied her down on the bed.  
He climbed on the bed beside her and held her close to him as she slowly dozed off in his arms, comforted by the warmth of his touch.

As she slept peacefully, he looked at her, noting how beautiful she looked even as she was sleeping. 

He couldn’t help but feel guilty for almost breaking up with her. He was about to break up with her that very moment he discovered that she had a brain tumor, which most likely was the cause of her irrational decisions. He was so angry and confused about her actions- yelling at his face that she didn’t want a baby and subsequently running away when she had been on board trying for a baby just a couple of weeks prior to that. Now that he understood her irrational decisions were due to her tumor, he felt so guilty for being angry at her for something which was beyond her control. He tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear as she continued sleeping peacefully.  
Now that she was back in his arms, he vowed in his heart to make it up to her and love her even more.  
He finally drifted off to sleep too, feeling the comfort of her in his arms.

That night, they both slept peacefully, snuggled up to each other for the first time in months.

_______________________________________________________________

The next morning

The bright sunlight shining through the bedroom window woke Amelia up from her sleep. Rubbing sleep from her eyes, she looked around the bedroom as she came to her senses and realized that she was actually sleeping in her own bedroom for the first time in several months. The bedside clock showed 8:30 am.

Turning over to the other side of the bed, her heart sank when she noticed that Owen’s side of the bed was empty. As far as she recalled, Owen had taken another few days off work to be by her side. Where could he be?

Groaning as she felt a headache, she slowly got out of bed and stumbled towards the bathroom. On the way to the bathroom, a note placed on the bedside table caught her eye.

She walked over to the bedside table and picked up the note. A smile formed on her face as she saw Owen’s familiar scrawly handwriting.

‘ Dear Amelia

I got called to help out in the ER today as there was a huge pile-up which brought a sudden influx of patients. But I’ll be back as soon as I can in the evening. I have called Addison and she is coming over to accompany you today.

P.s. I love you’

As she slowly went down the stairs after her shower, she thought she smelt the aroma of coffee. For a moment, she wondered whether she was imagining it.

To her pleasant surprise, when she reached the bottom of the stairs, she saw Addison in the kitchen pouring two cups of coffee.

She smiled as she walked into the kitchen.

‘ Oh hey.’ Addison greeted her cheerfully. ‘ You’re awake! I’ve made a cup of coffee for you as well, just as you like it. 

Amelia took a seat next to Addison beside the kitchen table as she sipped the coffee. It tasted heavenly.

‘ Thank you, Addie.’ she said gratefully. ‘ It tastes perfect.’

Glad that her friend liked the coffee she made for her, Addison added, ‘ I’ve made waffles too. Chocolate and peanut butter waffles, which are your favorite. You were the one who taught me how to make those waffles.’ Addison admitted as she sliced a piece and placed it on a plate in front of Amelia. ‘ Jake and Henry love them. I always make it for breakfast.’

‘ I’m glad that you put the skills I taught you to good use.’ Amelia said chuckling. ‘ Unfortunately, I’m not a good cook when it comes to lunch and dinner though. Owen is a much better cook than I am.’

The two women exchanged a smile. 

‘ Speaking of Owen, he called me early this morning asking me to accompany you for the whole day.’ Addison admitted. ‘ I was actually contemplating coming over before his call, but I was afraid I would disturb your privacy. ‘

‘ You mean you’re afraid you would find us making out on the couch or going even further than that?’ Amelia winked at Addison.

‘ Ugh… don’t give me that visual.’ Addison groaned playfully as she pretended to dismiss the thought with a wave of her hand.

‘ Well- I do remember walking in on you and Sam at home one time.' Amelia teased as Addison covered her face with her hands.

' You still remember that.' Addison muttered.

' Of course, I do. This is a good thing because it shows that my memory is still intact.' Amelia replied cheerfully.

‘ You seem to be feeling better now. I’m glad.’ Addison pointed out, changing the topic.

‘ I’m still having some headache.’ Amelia admitted.

‘ Studies show that caffeine helps with a migraine.’ Addison said. ‘ So finish your coffee.’

Amelia closed her eyes as she savored the taste of coffee going down her throat.

‘ It feels a little weird, enjoying breakfast in the morning without having to rush to work.’ Amelia admitted as she took a bite of her waffle. ‘ Oh my God, Addie, this tastes so delicious!’

‘ Do you even make them yourself anymore?’ Addison asked as she narrowed her eyes.

‘ Well, I do make them sometimes, for my sisters, nieces, and nephew. Owen loves them too. But your waffles top mine.’ Amelia said as she took another bite of the waffle.

‘ Well, I learned from the best.’ Addison smiled as she looked at Amelia enjoying her breakfast.

There was a comfortable silence in the kitchen as both women enjoyed their food. 

‘ Amelia- how long have you not been home?’ Addison asked, breaking the silence.

‘ A few months.’ Amelia noted. ‘ We were both planning to try for a baby right away. But I suddenly felt suffocated by my fear of having another anencephalic baby. Instead of talking it through with him and admitting my fears to him, I shouted at his face that he was suffocating me like he did to Cristina, and I ran away from him. In retrospect, I think it was the tumor. But I have to take responsibility for my actions too.’

Addison wondered silently whether Amelia’s action of running away from James was also caused by her tumor. It might be too late to save James and Amelia’s relationship, but it wasn’t too late to salvage Amelia’s relationship with Owen.

‘I hope Owen understands now that you had no control over your actions, and that it was not your fault.’ Addison said. ‘ He seems to be a really nice and understanding guy.’

Amelia swallowed hard before replying. ‘ That day when he found out about the tumor, he was about to break up with me, Addie. He was really mad at me for running away from him. When he saw my name on the scans and realized that those were mine- you could see the look of guilt and devastation on his face. He was there to support me after that.'

Addison remained silent, not wanting to interfere in her friend’s personal life, but wanting to just be there for her. 

‘He wasn’t there when I was in pain post-op. You were there, Maggie and Meredith were there. But he wasn’t. Knowing him, I think he was hurt, confused and couldn’t take seeing me in so much pain.’ Amelia continued. ‘I gave him an out yesterday- I told him that I don’t know who I am anymore and that he was free to leave me. But he refused to leave and instead claimed that I’m his wife in sickness and in health. His words really melted my heart.'

‘ I agree- maybe he was hurt, confused and couldn’t bear to see you in so much pain.’ Addison said.

I’m just so grateful that he’s here to support me now, after how I’ve treated him- running away from him with no explanation. I know it’s due to the tumor, but I would’ve left myself. Owen is such a great guy indeed.’ Amelia admitted.

‘ Amelia.’ Addison said as she held Amelia’s hand. ‘ You should stop blaming yourself. You couldn’t control your actions because of the tumor. Now that the tumor is gone- you can be yourself again. It might take quite a while for you and for those around you to adjust to the new normal, but once you’ve adjusted, you will be fine.'

‘ I hope so.’ Amelia shrugged as she took another bite of her waffle.

Just then, her phone rang. 

‘ It’s Charlotte calling through FaceTime.’ she announced as she answered the call, and signaled Addison to move closer to her.

‘ Amelia!’ Charlotte exclaimed, excited to see her friend. ‘ How are you doing?! Oh, you have a nice headband there.’

‘ Yeah…. For a moment post-operatively, I thought I was gorked, and it was a scary feeling. I was in extreme pain for the first day and spoke French, a language which I didn’t know I still speak. But I’m fine now, except for some headache, nausea, and vomiting.’ Amelia admitted. 

‘ I’m so glad that you’re ok.’ Charlotte said earnestly.‘ I would give you a hug right now if I was there. Can you give her a hug for me, Addie?’

‘ At your service.’ Addison chuckled as she gave Amelia a tight hug.

Amelia continued chatting with Charlotte for several more minutes before the rest of the L.A. gang joined Charlotte in the kitchen. Amelia took turns to speak to each one of them personally. 

‘Amelia,' Sam said suddenly as she was chatting with him. ‘Look who is here to pay a visit.'

Amelia gasped as she saw Sheldon walk into the kitchen.

‘Sheldon!!’ she exclaimed. ‘ I’ve missed you so much! ‘

‘I’ve missed you too.’ he said, smiling at his old friend as he waved at her.

They spent a good half an hour chatting, catching up on each other's lives, as Sheldon filled Amelia in about his impromptu trips around the world. After Miranda had passed, he took her last words to heart and traveled to every continent in the world. He was determined to enjoy life to the fullest, making full use of the second chance in life he had been given. Amelia loved receiving postcards from him. 

The rest of the L.A. gang added to the conversation at times, as a cheerful atmosphere filled the kitchen of Oceanside Wellness and also the Hunt home.

By the time Amelia had finished chatting with her friends, an hour had passed and she was feeling much better.

Addison and Amelia spent the entire day watching romantic chick flicks and eating ice cream and frozen pizza.

_______________________________________________________________

Owen returned home early that evening, and Addison excused herself to return back to her hotel room.

Owen and Amelia were sitting in the living room, relaxing on the couch after having some grilled chicken which Owen cooked for dinner. Owen had just finished changing Amelia's bandage.

Amelia was starting to feel a little exhausted from chatting and watching movies with Addison for the whole day.

‘ You feeling better now?’ Owen asked as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her near to him. She snuggled close to him, resting her head on his chest and feeling the warmth of his heartbeat.

‘ A little better. Addison was a great companion and kept me entertained for the whole day. We watched movies and ate pizza. And I FaceTimed my L.A. friends too.’ Amelia answered, smiling.

‘ I’m glad that she’s here to keep you company. She seems like a very good friend indeed.’ Owen said earnestly.

‘ Yes, she’s much more of a sister to me than my biological sisters.’ Amelia admitted.

‘ You sure you don’t want me to call your mom or any of your sisters to come over?’ Owen asked.

‘ No.’ Amelia answered adamantly. ‘ They weren’t here for our wedding, they don’t get to be here for my recovery.’

‘ Well ok.’ Owen conceded. ‘ I respect your decision. I just thought that you need some support from your family.’

‘ They are not family. You are my family. Maggie, Meredith and our other colleagues are my family. My friends in L.A. are my family.’ Amelia answered.

Owen remained silent, feeling sorry for Amelia that her family members weren’t more supportive of her.

They sat in comfortable silence on the couch, staring at the TV which was airing a family drama, but not really watching it.

Sighing, Owen picked up the remote control and switched off the TV.

‘ Amelia.’ he said. ‘ I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for being such an ass recently. I could sense that there was something wrong with you and it was not your normal behavior. But instead of supporting you and trying to find out why, I blamed you and thought you were behaving irrationally. I even thought that you were using again. I was upset, angry and confused about the time you ran away from me. In my mind, I blamed myself, wondering what did I do wrong to cause you to run away.’

‘It’s ok- you were hurt, confused and angry. You didn’t understand why I ran away. ‘Amelia said.

‘Yes, I was angry with you, but that didn’t excuse my kiss with Teddy. ‘Owen admitted. ‘ I was hurting and upset, and I didn’t know where you were. She was there with me at that time, offering me support and comfort, which I took advantage of. She pushed me away, saying that we should remain just friends and nothing more than that. In hindsight, I realize that I was just acting at the spur of the moment. I don’t feel the same way about her as I feel about you. She’s just a friend- but you, you’re my wife and the love of my life.’

Amelia remained silent for a moment as she tried to process his words, She would be lying if she said that it didn’t hurt, because it did. 

‘Well - I would be lying to the both of us if I say that hearing your admission doesn't hurt, because it does.’ she admitted. ‘But I’m glad that you’re being upfront and honest to me about it, instead of keeping it a secret from me. I know you were hurt and acted out in the spur of the moment that time. I trust you when you say that you both are just friends and nothing more than that. I hope I can continue to trust you on that.’ she said as she looked at him in the eyes.

‘ Yes, you can trust me, Amelia.’ said Owen as he held her hands and looked back at her with pleading eyes. ‘I promise I will never hurt you again.’

‘ I’m so sorry for running away too.’ Amelia admitted. ‘ I know it’s a stupid and irrational thing to do. Yes- I was, and still am afraid of having another anencephalic baby. But I should have opened up to you and discussed it with you instead of running away like that. I just couldn’t control my actions. I was hurt and confused too. Now I know why.’

A brief moment of silence passed as Owen tried to process Amelia’s words.

‘ You had an anencephalic baby before?’ he asked softly. He remembered her briefly mentioning to him about her baby in the hospital chapel when they were lighting a candle for Samuel Avery, but they were merely colleagues that time, and she never brought up the topic anymore after that.

‘I did.’ she replied. ‘It was Ryan’s. He was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen. I held him in my arms for several minutes before he developed respiratory distress and had to be taken away from me. When Addison and Jake took him away,  it was like a piece of me was being taken away, and it left a hole in my heart. I called him my unicorn baby because he was miraculous. I was given the option to abort him earlier on,  but I decided to carry him to term so that he could donate his organs. In the end, after his birth, he donated his organs and saved lots of lives during his short time here on earth.’ 

‘I’m so sorry to hear that, Amelia. That’s a very honorable thing to do.’ Owen whispered, as he took her hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze as a gesture of support. He respected her even more now. Not every woman would willingly carry their anencephalic baby to term just so that they could donate their baby’s organs. It was such a noble thing to do.

Amelia shook her head as a stray tear rolled down her cheek.

‘I still miss him so much and think about him sometimes, when I’m alone. I wonder if he’s happy up there with Ryan, Derek and Dad. Maybe they’re taking good care of him. ‘ she sighed as she looked up at the ceiling. 

Owen’s heart broke at her admission. He couldn’t imagine losing a child after holding the child in his arms. He held her tight, rubbing soothing circles on her back, at loss of words to say to her.

‘ That’s the reason why I’m afraid to have another baby. I’m afraid that our baby would be anencephalic too.’ Amelia admitted. ‘It was the main reason I ran away actually. In my tumor filled mind, I was afraid that you would leave me if our baby had any abnormality.’

‘Amelia, I would never leave you, regardless of whether we have healthy babies or not. Remember, we are married. We are in this together. ‘Owen said earnestly.

‘I know. Which is why I feel so guilty for running away from you without an explanation. ‘Amelia admitted. ‘I should have opened up to you and talked to you about my innermost fears instead of just shouting at your face that I didn’t want a baby after agreeing to try for one just a couple of weeks prior to that. I knew that running away was the wrong thing to do but I couldn’t help myself. I couldn’t control my actions. I didn’t even know the person I was becoming anymore.’ she added as another stray tear rolled down her cheek.

‘It’s ok, Amelia, I didn’t get it back then, but I do now. You had no control over your actions. But now that the tumor has been removed, you can return back to being you.’ Owen said comfortingly.

‘To being me? I don’t even know who the real me is anymore.’ Amelia said as she shook her head sadly.

‘ You are brave, strong, amazing, intelligent, compassionate, kind, caring person and an extraordinarily skilled neurosurgeon. That's the real you.’ Owen said earnestly as he took Amelia’s hands and looked her in the eye.

As she blushed, he cupped her face in his hands, wiping away a stray tear with his thumb.

‘I love you so much, Amelia. Listen, we don’t need to have babies just yet. When the time comes, we’ll talk about it. But right now, we’ll just enjoy each other first, ok?’ he suggested.

‘Ok. I love you too.‘Amelia answered as she leaned back on his chest and he held her tight.

‘Owen?’ Amelia asked as she looked up at him.

‘Yes? ‘he answered as he looked at her lovingly.

‘Will I still be a neurosurgeon again? If yes, will my surgical skills still be the same as before? ‘she asked, fear and worry evident in her eyes and in the tone of her voice.

‘ Of course, you will. ‘ Owen said confidently. ‘ Remember what Dr.Koracick said? He said that you will return to being the brilliant neurosurgeon you are in a month’s time. He’s confident that your surgical skills haven’t been affected at all.’

‘But he’s cocky. He always talks highly of himself. What if I am not as good as before? My patients will pay the price.’ Amelia said, frowning, as the reality of the situation hit her hard.

‘ Amelia, listen.’ Owen said as he cupped her face in his hands again. ‘You will go back to becoming the amazing, brilliant, talented, skilled neurosurgeon you are. It might take longer than expected, and require a lot of hard work and determination. But you’ll pull through like you always do, being the strong fighter you are. I have full faith and confidence in you, so you should too. ' he said as he looked at her, an honest expression in his eyes.

Feeling encouraged by her husband’s support and confidence in her, Amelia leaned back to Owen, feeling the comfort of his hands wrapped around her shoulder. She had to admit, she really missed his touch for the past couple of months and it felt good to finally be back in his arms.  
_______________________________________________________________

Throughout the following week, Amelia continued recuperating at home. It was a welcomed change for the first few days, just lazing around the house, not having to rush to the hospital to round on pre and post-operative patients early in the morning. It felt good, not having to rush back and forth from the ER to the OR and skipping lunch. She could sit down on the couch in front of the TV to enjoy a proper meal while watching her favorite TV shows. 

Addison had returned back to L.A., after expressing remorse for not being able to spend more time with Amelia due to work obligations. But she promised to FaceTime her daily.

Meredith and Maggie took turns visiting her when they weren’t at work, bringing the Shepherd children to cheer her up.

For a few days, Owen stayed at home to accompany her. He would make breakfast for her in the mornings, and prepare her favorite food for lunch and dinner.

It was bliss as she snuggled on the couch in front of the TV beside him, leaning onto him as they binged watched TV shows and movies. Owen had bought plenty of chocolate ice cream, her favorite dessert, which she savored while they binge-watched.

Night times were spent snuggled in bed, with him reading journals and her reading some story books which she purchased but never had the time to read before. They would chat for hours about their past, their families, their innermost secrets, and dreams.  
They both felt that they had discovered more about each other during these few days than in the past months they had been married.  
Amelia confessed to Owen how her family had always treated her as a disappointment, and how she always felt like she was the black sheep of the family. Owen confessed about how he still felt guilty deep inside about what happened to Megan, although she had assured him repeatedly that she forgave him and it wasn’t his fault. Amelia comforted him, saying that she knew what it felt like, but at least Megan was still alive and he still had the chance to make things right with her.

They would then fall asleep on their huge comfortable bed, snuggled close to each other.  
_______________________________________________________________

After a few days, Owen had to return back to work. He wasn't able to take a longer leave due to a shortage of trauma surgeons in the ER. He was reluctant to leave Amelia alone at home, but she assured him that she would be fine. 

The first day of being left alone in the house, Amelia was bored out of her mind. Both Meredith and Maggie were at work, so she had no one to keep her company. She focused her energy on doing household chores, sweeping and vacuuming the entire house clean. The furniture was dusted, decorations rearranged, and windows scrubbed clean.  
Owen called from work, reminding her to rest and take care of herself. She promised him on the phone that she would rest, but returned to doing household chores instead.

That evening, she attempted to prepare dinner for Owen before he returned home from work. Her attempt to grill chicken was unsuccessful as she set the fire alarm off. 

Owen came home to a tearful wife that evening. He comforted her, saying that he was touched by her effort and she should rest and not attempt to cook for him. They ended up ordering pizza that night.

‘Amelia, you’re supposed to rest and recuperate at home, not do housework.’ Owen said as they were snuggled on the couch that night. 

‘I know, but I just can’t help it. I’m going crazy without anything to do at home and anyone to keep me company.’ she admitted. ‘I cannot chat with my L.A. friends for the whole day, they have patients to tend to. Also, I will go crazy watching sappy soap operas and reading sappy novels the whole day.’

Owen chuckled, acknowledging the truth in her words.

‘How about I let Megan keep you company?’ he suggested as Amelia gave him an incredulous look. ‘ Her fever has subsided and her white blood count is back to normal. She is going to be discharged tomorrow and I’m thinking of letting her rest at home too. She insisted on staying with our mom, but I asked her to come home to stay with us for a few days first, as mom needs a little more time to prepare the house for her homecoming.'

‘Your sister who hates me and says that I’m a terrible wife to you?’ she asked, her eyebrows furrowed. Her blood was starting to boil again, as he didn’t even ask for her permission to bring his sister back. She tried to calm herself down, knowing that she had to think and act rationally. After taking a deep breath, she realized that Megan was Owen’s sister after all, and he had every right to bring his own sister back to their house. Still, it would have been nice if he had consulted her first.

‘She doesn’t hate you, Amelia. She just doesn’t know you yet. Once she gets to know you, she’ll love you, I’m sure.’ Owen said as Amelia pretended to be interested in the game show they were watching.

‘ What are we supposed to talk about?’ Amelia muttered. ‘The weather?’

Owen chuckled at her sarcastic remark. He was glad that the Amelia with the witty remarks was back.

‘You should give her a chance.’ he said. ‘ I spoke to her again for quite some time yesterday, telling her about what an amazing person you are. She trusts me, and it seemed like she believed me yesterday. I told her to give you a chance too.’ Owen said earnestly.  
‘ Both of you have rather similar personalities and I think you’ll get along well with each other.’

‘Well, okay.’ Amelia said hesitantly.

‘ Besides, you wouldn’t be alone with her. Her son, Farouk would be with her.’ said Owen.

‘ Alright.’ Amelia conceded. ‘ I’ll try. I’ll be nice to her. But you have to make it up to me later’ she said, winking at him.

‘Amelia! I thought Dr. Koracick said no sex for at least a few weeks!’ Owen exclaimed, a horrified look on his face.

‘ I don’t mean that! I mean ice cream and cuddles on the living room couch! ‘Amelia retorted as she smacked him playfully on the arm.

They both laughed as they snuggled close to each other on the couch and continued watching TV.  
_______________________________________________________________

Megan and Farouk arrived at the house at 10 a.m. the next day. Owen had gone to the hospital to pick them up.

Amelia was sitting alone on the living room couch, waiting anxiously for her sister-in-law’s arrival. 

Her heart beat fast when she heard the front door unlock and a little boy’s excited voice outside the door.

She straightened her hair as she walked towards the door to greet them.

Megan was dressed in street clothes for the first time since she saw her, and beside her was a cute Middle Eastern boy.

‘ Hey.’ she greeted politely.

To her pleasant surprise, Megan smiled at her.

‘ Hey.’ she greeted back.

‘ Farouk, this is your aunt Amelia.’ she said as she bent down to speak to the child. ‘ Say hi to her.’ 

‘ Hi aunt Amelia.’ the boy greeted cheerfully as he extended a hand for her to shake.

‘Amelia, this is my son, Farouk.’ Megan said. 

‘ Hey, Farouk. Nice to meet you.’ Amelia said, finding herself smiling. too. Megan had done a great job of raising this kid right, she thought to herself.

As Owen lead Megan to the guestroom, carrying her luggage for her, Amelia was left alone with Farouk in the living room.

‘ Wow, this is such a nice house!’ Farouk exclaimed as he admired the interior of the house. 

' Thanks.’ Amelia replied. ‘ It usually isn’t this tidy.’

‘Wow! You have lots of books!' Farouk pointed out excitedly as he ran over to the mini library set up at the corner of the living room.

‘Yes, they’re all adult books though.’ Amelia answered. ‘ Do you like reading?’

‘ Yes, I do.’ Farouk said excitedly. ‘They don’t have English books over there though. My mom was the one who taught me English.’

‘That’s good.’ Amelia said smiling. ‘The more languages you learn, the better.’

‘Do you want to watch TV? ‘ she asked, switching on the TV for him. ‘ What do you like to watch?’

‘I don’t know. There isn’t much to watch on TV over there.’ the boy answered. 

‘You can watch as much TV as you want here.’ Amelia said. ‘ Do you watch cartoons?’ she asked as she switched to a channel which the Shepherd kids loved to watch.

By the time Owen came down the stairs with Megan, Farouk was already engrossed in the new children’s TV show he had discovered.

‘ Make yourselves comfortable, alright?’ Owen said to his wife, sister and nephew. ‘I’ll be back in the evening. I love you all.’

‘Don’t worry, we’ll have a blast.’ Megan said as she winked at him.

He ruffled Farouk's hair playfully before giving Megan a hug. He then walked over to Amelia and kissed her gently on the lips before whispering in her ear. ‘It’s ok, she’s nice, trust me.’

Amelia nodded as she smiled up at him reassuringly.

‘I’ll be fine. We’ll be fine.’ she whispered back. ‘Now, go save some lives.’

As Owen left, only the sound of the TV was heard, as Farouk continued being engrossed in the show and Amelia and Megan both struggled to find the right words to say to each other.

‘ He’s such a good boy.’ Amelia said, breaking the silence.

‘ He is.’ Megan agreed, smiling. ‘His parents were killed in an air strike years ago, and he had no relatives left. He had no one. He was crying and looking at me with pleading eyes. I just had to take him in.’

‘That’s very noble of you.’ Amelia said earnestly, having new found respect for her sister-in-law.

‘ Now I can't imagine my life without him. I was afraid I would be separated from him forever and wouldn’t be able to get him back. So imagine my joy when he appeared in front of me last week.’ Megan admitted. ‘I’m forever grateful to Nathan and Meredith for helping to bring him to me.’

‘I can imagine.’ Amelia said earnestly as she nodded. For a brief moment, she wondered what her life would have been like had her unicorn baby still been alive.

Another tense silence came in between them as Megan struggled to find the right words to say to Amelia. Ever since Owen told her about Amelia having a tumor, she had felt remorse for misjudging and making assumptions about her. Owen had explained to her that Amelia was usually a very funny, smart, kind, caring, loving and compassionate woman, and that her actions were probably caused by the tumor.

‘ You never got to know her.’ Owen had said. ‘ You will love her once you get to know her.’ 

‘ Well, ok, since you’re my big brother and I always trust your judgment, I’ll try to get to know her.’ Megan had conceded, rolling her eyes playfully at him.

Megan cleared her throat before she began.

‘ I’m sorry.’ she said.

Amelia turned to look at her, puzzled.

‘ Sorry for what?’ she asked.

‘ I’m sorry for misjudging you and making assumptions about you.’ Megan admitted. ‘ I wondered where you were when I first arrived and Owen was there by my side taking care of me. I asked him why weren’t you there by his side taking care of him and offering him emotional support. I assumed that you were a distant type of person who didn’t care much about your marriage. I questioned his marriage to you. I even told him that he deserved better. I didn’t know that you were also fighting your own battle that time. Owen explained to me that the tumor caused you to be unable to control your actions, and now I understand. I’m so sorry.’

Amelia looked at Megan and saw the honest expression in her sister-in-law’s face and the earnest tone in her voice.

‘ I accept your apology and I don’t blame you.’ she said honestly. ‘I wouldn’t like me either if I were in your shoes. When you first arrived, I just disappeared while Owen was still coming to terms with you reappearing in his life. As his wife, I should have been there to support him, but instead, I was nowhere to be found. So I totally understand why you would think that way. You were just looking out for your sibling because you love him. If my brother’s wife disappeared when he needed her, I would have thought the same.’

Megan nodded in relief, grateful that they could have a civil discussion. She was starting to like her sister-in-law.

‘ Thank you. I’m glad that we can talk this through like the mature adults we are.’ she said. ‘ Let’s start anew, shall we?’

‘ Ok, let’s.’ Amelia agreed, smiling back at her.

They started a casual conversation, which began as chatting about work, with Amelia telling Megan about her work as a neurosurgeon and Megan filling her in about working in the army.

They then talked about their families and backgrounds, with Amelia telling Megan about Derek and her sisters, and Megan telling Amelia about the strong bond she shared with Owen as children.

‘ Once, a guy in class bullied me and I came back crying.’ Megan admitted. ‘ The next day, Owen went to class and beat the guy up badly. They both got suspended, but that was when I knew that I would always have my brother’s back.’

‘ Derek would do the same for me.’ Amelia sighed sadly at the memory of her brother.

‘ I’m sorry.’ Megan said as she touched Amelia’s arm comfortingly. ‘ I can’t imagine losing a sibling.’

‘ Do you know that Owen never stopped thinking about you?’ Amelia said. ‘ He would always tell me about you and say how much he missed you. He told me how you always tagged along with him when he went out with friends and how you both shared a strong bond together.'

The two women shared a smile.

‘ One night he was dreaming of you and woke up screaming your name.’ Amelia recalled. ‘ He really thought that you were dead, but he still clung on to the hope of you being alive. According to him, not a day went by without him thinking of you.’

Megan remained silent, feeling guilt overcome her. In retrospect, she should have at least made an effort to contact her family to let them know that she was still alive. 

‘ When we received the news that you were still alive, Owen blamed himself. He was in a daze the entire day, and he told me that he felt so guilty for going on with his life while you were being held captive in the war zone. I think he’s still blaming himself now.’ Amelia continued.

‘ I’ll need to have a heart to heart talk to him about it later.’ Megan admitted.

‘ Yes, please do talk to him. He loves you so much.’ Amelia said.

‘ He loves you so much too. I can see it in his eyes when he speaks about you.’ Megan pointed out. ‘ When we were younger, I used to tease him that he would have a hard time finding a woman who would give him many children. He had always been a family person, and always wanted a big family.’

‘ I know.’ Amelia nodded. 

‘ Have you both ever discussed having a family?’ Megan asked.

‘ Well, we had that discussion before, but I guess it hasn’t happened just yet.’ Amelia answered, feeling a bit uncomfortable about the question.

Megan nodded in understanding. ‘ He shouldn’t force you into starting a family. You shouldn’t be pressured to if you’re not ready.’ she said.

Amelia contemplated telling Megan about her unicorn baby but decided that it was a story for another time.

‘ I know.’ she nodded instead.

‘ So tell me- what made you fall for my brother?’ Megan asked in a light-hearted manner.

‘ Wow, where do I start?’ Amelia answered, laughing. ‘ Well, first off- at work, he is hard-working, dedicated, strict and takes charge of things. In personal life though, he is loyal, kind, caring, loving and compassionate.’ 

‘ Well, ok.’ Megan agreed. ‘ Yes, he has those characteristics in him.’

‘ He would get a kick out of us talking about him.’ Amelia joked.

‘ Let’s tease him about it later.’ Megan winked.

The two women chatted for the whole day- throughout TV sessions with Farouk, while making lunch and eating ice-cream together, and while going for an afternoon stroll in the neighborhood.

Megan told Amelia about her time in the army and her time in captivity for the past 10 years. Amelia listened attentively, feeling uttermost respect for her sister-in-law. She had respect for all the people who served in the army, but being a woman and serving in the battlefield deserved an entirely new level of respect altogether. 

That evening, when Owen turned the keys of the main door and opened it, he was pleasantly surprised to hear laughter and excited chatter coming from the direction of the living room. Apparently, his plan to have his wife and sister bond worked out well. Knowing that everything was going to be fine after all, he smiled to himself as he walked towards the living room to join them. Life was good indeed.

 

Alright guys- this is it- the end of chapter 3 of ‘I’m A Fighter’. I hope you liked it! Comments, reblogs, reviews and messages are very much appreciated. Please do let me know what you think- I would love to hear from you all!! <3 <3 <3


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